In my last post, I talked about creating a positive story, or mantra, to counter any negative stories you catch yourself in. Kirsten Harrell, Psy.D. and Traci Harrell have created a website dedicated to positive mantras and attitude shifters that can be downloaded onto an ipod or purchased on CD. Enjoy!
Check them out at:
www.ipopin.com
Monday, August 28, 2006
Clearing out the Critical Clutter
Why can't I seem to keep friends? Why can't I keep a boyfriend? Why am I unhappy in my job? Why is my house such a wreck? Why do I keep getting sick? Why do I seem to be a magnet for bad tidings?
If these questions often circulate through your head, it's time to clear out the clutter. I don't necessarily mean physical clutter either. I am also referring to the critical thinking clutter we allow to take over our thoughts. It makes concentrating on anything hard and it hurts our self esteem. In coaching terms, we call these our stories. We each have certain stories we tell ourselves. Unfortunately, most of the time we don't even know we are being critical of ourselves because those thoughts have become such a part of our subconscious selves.
I'll share a story that I once tortured myself with. One day a friend of mine asked me to go climbing. I was thrilled to be asked as I always seemed to sit back and wait for someone else to do the asking. (Sound familiar?) Shortly after accepting the invitation, I became aware of a thought that went through my head. Almost immediately I said to myself that she was only asking me because she needed a climbing partner. I then noticed a pattern as I ran through a slew of other moments that people "only asked me to join them because..." I did adventurous activities, I had extra gear, they needed someone to go with...etc, etc.
It was a comfortable thought, which scared me. I knew that it was so natural because I had become so accustomed to believing and repeating it. I don't know when the thought started or how long I had been telling myself this story. It was subconscious until I caught myself. What a horrible lie I had been telling myself. I was subtracting my own self worth through a thought I didn't even know I was capable of! Of course these friends wanted me around.
I began practicing a change in attitude to clear out the critical clutter. Instead of thinking people only asked me to do things because they needed to, I began reminding myself that they wouldn't ask if they didn't want me there. Not to mention they didn't have to invite me in the first place! I began asking them to do things, too. This not only made me a better friend (it is a two way road!), but it also reinforced the fact that they wanted me around because they said yes when they could have said no. I then began a personal mantra to flip that story in my head every time I caught myself thinking it.
Not only did I learn something about myself, but I saw how I was hurting my own relationships through it. The time had come to stop blaming others and to stop making excuses. I noticed a pattern and the problems that manifested from it in my personal life. I took control, worked with my coach and came up with a solution to take responsibility. What a wonderful outcome I created! My friends have grown exponentially since then.
I encourage you today to listen to those little thoughts that race through your head. The ones that say you can't do it, you aren't worth it or that no one will care. Take control of your stories, flip them around and make sure you squash them before they do any more damage. Clear out the critical clutter to move forward and live an undeniably happy life because it starts with your actions. You ARE worth it, you CAN do it and I promise, we DO care. You're only as successful, personable and wise as you allow yourself to be. Why hold yourself back?
Love and encouragement,
Coach Katie
If these questions often circulate through your head, it's time to clear out the clutter. I don't necessarily mean physical clutter either. I am also referring to the critical thinking clutter we allow to take over our thoughts. It makes concentrating on anything hard and it hurts our self esteem. In coaching terms, we call these our stories. We each have certain stories we tell ourselves. Unfortunately, most of the time we don't even know we are being critical of ourselves because those thoughts have become such a part of our subconscious selves.
I'll share a story that I once tortured myself with. One day a friend of mine asked me to go climbing. I was thrilled to be asked as I always seemed to sit back and wait for someone else to do the asking. (Sound familiar?) Shortly after accepting the invitation, I became aware of a thought that went through my head. Almost immediately I said to myself that she was only asking me because she needed a climbing partner. I then noticed a pattern as I ran through a slew of other moments that people "only asked me to join them because..." I did adventurous activities, I had extra gear, they needed someone to go with...etc, etc.
It was a comfortable thought, which scared me. I knew that it was so natural because I had become so accustomed to believing and repeating it. I don't know when the thought started or how long I had been telling myself this story. It was subconscious until I caught myself. What a horrible lie I had been telling myself. I was subtracting my own self worth through a thought I didn't even know I was capable of! Of course these friends wanted me around.
I began practicing a change in attitude to clear out the critical clutter. Instead of thinking people only asked me to do things because they needed to, I began reminding myself that they wouldn't ask if they didn't want me there. Not to mention they didn't have to invite me in the first place! I began asking them to do things, too. This not only made me a better friend (it is a two way road!), but it also reinforced the fact that they wanted me around because they said yes when they could have said no. I then began a personal mantra to flip that story in my head every time I caught myself thinking it.
Not only did I learn something about myself, but I saw how I was hurting my own relationships through it. The time had come to stop blaming others and to stop making excuses. I noticed a pattern and the problems that manifested from it in my personal life. I took control, worked with my coach and came up with a solution to take responsibility. What a wonderful outcome I created! My friends have grown exponentially since then.
I encourage you today to listen to those little thoughts that race through your head. The ones that say you can't do it, you aren't worth it or that no one will care. Take control of your stories, flip them around and make sure you squash them before they do any more damage. Clear out the critical clutter to move forward and live an undeniably happy life because it starts with your actions. You ARE worth it, you CAN do it and I promise, we DO care. You're only as successful, personable and wise as you allow yourself to be. Why hold yourself back?
Love and encouragement,
Coach Katie
Monday, August 07, 2006
Wisdom from Jack Canfield
"The greater danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it."
-Michelangelo
I am reading Jack Canfield's THE SUCCESS PRINCIPLES and it is reinforcing everything I have ever known in life. At one point he references something General Wesley Clark told him. General Clark said, "It doesn't take any more energy to create a big dream than it does to create a little one."
This, of course, was in his section on creating a vision. Create your vision and make it big. You have unique talents and gifts. I do not know and will not know who will read this today...or tomorrow...or in ten years. Yet I am still confident that each of you reading this has a natural combination of gifts that no one else on this earth has. You have a voice and you have a purpose. Find what that is, embrace it, follow it and create your life around it. If you do that, nothing can stop you. Nothing is more powerful than a human being with a vision that has excitement, courage and anxiety pushing it forward.
Dream big today,
Coach Katie
-Michelangelo
I am reading Jack Canfield's THE SUCCESS PRINCIPLES and it is reinforcing everything I have ever known in life. At one point he references something General Wesley Clark told him. General Clark said, "It doesn't take any more energy to create a big dream than it does to create a little one."
This, of course, was in his section on creating a vision. Create your vision and make it big. You have unique talents and gifts. I do not know and will not know who will read this today...or tomorrow...or in ten years. Yet I am still confident that each of you reading this has a natural combination of gifts that no one else on this earth has. You have a voice and you have a purpose. Find what that is, embrace it, follow it and create your life around it. If you do that, nothing can stop you. Nothing is more powerful than a human being with a vision that has excitement, courage and anxiety pushing it forward.
Dream big today,
Coach Katie
Friday, August 04, 2006
Think Deep, Listen Hard and Trust Your Intuition
Artist/Band: Nickel Creek
Lyrics for Song: Hanging By A Thread
Lyrics for Album: This Side
.....
There's a kind of emptiness that can fill you.
There's a kind of hunger that can eat you up.
There's a cold and darker side of the moonlight.
An' there's a lonely side of love.
.....
There's a certain kind of pain that can numb you.
There's a type of freedom that can tie you down.
Sometimes the unexplained can define you,
And sometimes, silence is the only sound.
......
Wow. This song cut right through me. I had heard it a million times before, but I had not truly LISTENED. That is so true, so often in life. Only when you are ready to listen will your lessons reveal themselves. I was ready to hear what this song had to say. I was prepared to ponder the deeper meaning within myself. I ask that you do the same with them today. Take each line and really think of a time when that was true for you. Sit with each mismatching thought and allow them to melt together forming painful and loving truths about your character. Let those truths sink into your bones and LISTEN to the lessons they have for you.
Think deep today and listen carefully,
Coach Katie
Lyrics for Song: Hanging By A Thread
Lyrics for Album: This Side
.....
There's a kind of emptiness that can fill you.
There's a kind of hunger that can eat you up.
There's a cold and darker side of the moonlight.
An' there's a lonely side of love.
.....
There's a certain kind of pain that can numb you.
There's a type of freedom that can tie you down.
Sometimes the unexplained can define you,
And sometimes, silence is the only sound.
......
Wow. This song cut right through me. I had heard it a million times before, but I had not truly LISTENED. That is so true, so often in life. Only when you are ready to listen will your lessons reveal themselves. I was ready to hear what this song had to say. I was prepared to ponder the deeper meaning within myself. I ask that you do the same with them today. Take each line and really think of a time when that was true for you. Sit with each mismatching thought and allow them to melt together forming painful and loving truths about your character. Let those truths sink into your bones and LISTEN to the lessons they have for you.
Think deep today and listen carefully,
Coach Katie
Monday, July 31, 2006
Changing Seasons
I know it's only the end of July. I haven't lost my mind by writing about the changing of the seasons, I promise! I went biking at the Virginia Creeper Trail this past weekend and on our shuttle up the mountain, the driver stopped by an oak tree that was already starting to change colors. We all commented on how early it was. It seemed odd for the leaves to be changing already. He said it does this every year. Maybe it knows something we don't.
We all change seasons at different times in our lives. Some people are considered 'old souls.' Some are late to bloom. Where do you fall? What would happen if you had changed seasons sooner or later? What season of your life are you eager to enter into?
I'm featuring this thought as a full length article in my next e-newsletter. Sign up for FREE at: www.energizeyourmoment.com
Coach Katie
We all change seasons at different times in our lives. Some people are considered 'old souls.' Some are late to bloom. Where do you fall? What would happen if you had changed seasons sooner or later? What season of your life are you eager to enter into?
I'm featuring this thought as a full length article in my next e-newsletter. Sign up for FREE at: www.energizeyourmoment.com
Coach Katie
Monday, July 24, 2006
Get A Move On
There's a lot of waiting in life. One of my favorite quotes is by Joseph Campbell: "Life is not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be experienced." So much of our waiting game makes up that mystery. Things don't happen the way we want, or even expect, them to. All we can do is put ourselves in line with our values and set the path in front of us. What we encounter along that path is our mystery.
My request from you today is to get a move on. What do you want most? What makes you unhappy? What do you wish would happen? Give yourself a little control to set your path in motion. Start taking steps toward dissolving those things in your life that cause you discomfort and start adding to the pile of fun, meaningful and cherished moments.
What story continues to run through your head? Are you unhappy with your job? Unhappy with where you are living? Unhappy with your relationships? Do you want to visit Key West? Do you want to take a month off? Do you want to talk to that cute guy at the coffee shop? Do you want to work in a completely different field?
Get your momentum going in full force! Set your goal, set your action steps to align yourself with that goal and go after it. Start walking down that path and see what mysterious coincidences help you along the way. You never what is just around the corner-but you have to be open to seeing it! I talk a lot about awareness and this is key for today's blog. Being aware helps you to notice the little signs that point you toward your goal. It's like driving down a highway. How often do you notice the signs pointing to different destinations unless you are looking for them? Not often.
Follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Look for the signs. Begin your journey, even if it's scary.
Wake Up and Get a Move On Today!!
Coach Katie
My request from you today is to get a move on. What do you want most? What makes you unhappy? What do you wish would happen? Give yourself a little control to set your path in motion. Start taking steps toward dissolving those things in your life that cause you discomfort and start adding to the pile of fun, meaningful and cherished moments.
What story continues to run through your head? Are you unhappy with your job? Unhappy with where you are living? Unhappy with your relationships? Do you want to visit Key West? Do you want to take a month off? Do you want to talk to that cute guy at the coffee shop? Do you want to work in a completely different field?
Get your momentum going in full force! Set your goal, set your action steps to align yourself with that goal and go after it. Start walking down that path and see what mysterious coincidences help you along the way. You never what is just around the corner-but you have to be open to seeing it! I talk a lot about awareness and this is key for today's blog. Being aware helps you to notice the little signs that point you toward your goal. It's like driving down a highway. How often do you notice the signs pointing to different destinations unless you are looking for them? Not often.
Follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Look for the signs. Begin your journey, even if it's scary.
Wake Up and Get a Move On Today!!
Coach Katie
Friday, July 14, 2006
All Worked Up
STRESS! It's summertime and everyone wants to be outside playing, not inside working. I've been hearing a lot of my clients, friends and family talk about how stressed they are. Everything is piling up right about the time we want some freedom. Is it more work or is it the hunger to get out of the office, away from the kids and out into the sunshine?
I think we each want to experience new things in the summer, too. We say yes more, we sign up for more, we ask more of ourselves and we take more chances. All of these cause stress because our time is then limited. Use your judgement before you say yes to everything regarding the amount of stress it will cause you in the long run.
I've talked about abundance before and I think it's important to bring it up again here. Having an abundance of time and energy in the summer is the best gift you can give yourself. Try to plan your PTO days so you have a few extra during the summer months, work hard to wrap up your projects in a timely manner instead of sitting on them. Stop daydreaming and get to work! Take some time in the middle of the day to step outside and take a quick walk around the building or make a phone call. The sun will warm you right up and give you a bit more energy to make it through the rest of the day.
When you are able to go outside and do what you love to do, don't take it for granted. Relish the moment. Take an active role in the perfection of those few precious hours that you are carefree. Drink them up, remember them. So often the time passes us by before we know it and we don't feel like we really took account of how special it was.
When you are super stressed, find something to represent how centered you can be. Use it to bring yourself back to the fact that your stress level in temporary and if you remain calm, everything will find a way of completing itself. This can be a small stretch in the middle of the day, a mantra or a touch stone.
Enjoy the summer days and make some time to kick back, relax and enjoy!
Coach Katie
I think we each want to experience new things in the summer, too. We say yes more, we sign up for more, we ask more of ourselves and we take more chances. All of these cause stress because our time is then limited. Use your judgement before you say yes to everything regarding the amount of stress it will cause you in the long run.
I've talked about abundance before and I think it's important to bring it up again here. Having an abundance of time and energy in the summer is the best gift you can give yourself. Try to plan your PTO days so you have a few extra during the summer months, work hard to wrap up your projects in a timely manner instead of sitting on them. Stop daydreaming and get to work! Take some time in the middle of the day to step outside and take a quick walk around the building or make a phone call. The sun will warm you right up and give you a bit more energy to make it through the rest of the day.
When you are able to go outside and do what you love to do, don't take it for granted. Relish the moment. Take an active role in the perfection of those few precious hours that you are carefree. Drink them up, remember them. So often the time passes us by before we know it and we don't feel like we really took account of how special it was.
When you are super stressed, find something to represent how centered you can be. Use it to bring yourself back to the fact that your stress level in temporary and if you remain calm, everything will find a way of completing itself. This can be a small stretch in the middle of the day, a mantra or a touch stone.
Enjoy the summer days and make some time to kick back, relax and enjoy!
Coach Katie
Friday, July 07, 2006
Tiny Miracles
From a small book I own called Simple Wisdom comes this quote:
"Miracles surround us at every turn if we but sharpen our perceptions of them." -Willa Cather, writer
Use your perception today. Really see those miracles all around. Understand the miracle of a child reaching up for their parents' hand, the vegetable that a seed produces or the wisdom that made the internet possible. Wrap your mind around the gift you've been given to hear your friends laugh, to taste the food that you eat and to smell the summer air. Relish the moment that allows you to feel comfortable in your own skin.
I challenge you to find the small ones that often go unnoticed. What are your miracles today?
Have a great weekend,
Coach Katie
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
An Inconvenient Truth
Last night I was moved.
I want to share with you today the powerful impact a movie had on me. I hope you will consider seeing it for yourself. I hope you will consider making at least one change in the way you live to help this problem. An Inconvenient Truth is a movie bringing awareness to the growing issue of global warming on our society and the world. Al Gore does a superb job bringing this movie in front of those who need to see it – US. We are the problem and we are the solution.
Our inconvenient truth is that we are ruining this planet. It is a truth that we are all aware of. With every piece of trash we throw away, every tank of gas we fill up with, every hot day we turn our air conditioners on. We are aware of our creature comforts. We CHOOSE to ignore them, abuse them and convince ourselves that we are too small to do anything.
We are small. We are each one person. We each contribute to the effects of emissions and carbon dioxide used each year. TOGETHER we make a difference in the dissolving health of this planet. TOGETHER we can make a difference to begin changing our habits. TOGETHER we can make this planet healthy again.
I will leave the frightening statistics for Al Gore to share with you. I will tell you this – we cannot ignore this issue. It will affect us in our lifetime. It will affect our families and our children. This is not something we can ignore and eventually die wondering what impact we had. We will find discomfort in the coming years because of the state of our planet. How much discomfort are we willing to endure now to avoid the massive changes we are destined to see if we do nothing?
Please see this movie. Please help spread the word. Please start with you.
On a smaller scale, to tune this in to coaching, think about your own inconvenient truths. What are you avoiding now because it will hurt to face it? Is it a toxic relationship? A suffocating job? Fear? Loneliness? Wasteful nature? What is your inconvenient truth? Be honest. Plant the seed now in your soul – a brutally honest seed that you are harming yourself in the long run by not acting now. It hurts to remove the issue, but are the lasting effects negative in the long run? Are they negative in the short term if they continue?
What is your first step to move past this? Sometimes it is like ripping off a bandaid. Sometimes it is a slow removal. Do what works best for you, but don't stop until the problem is solved. Enlist friends and family. Put up notes to remind yourself. Journal. LIVE your life without the band aids. You don't need the crutch. You are strong enough, I promise. It starts with you. Make the choice, change the habits, create the flow of easy habits to continue moving forward.
My personal encouragement in the mountains. My desire to be in the mountains, to keep them pure, to keep them a healthy escape will spur me foward to make changes in my life to help this global warming problem. I will help spread the word. I will change my habits (http://www.climatecrisis.net/ see the Take Action link to see what you can do as well). I will continue to tell people about this movie. I will do my part. My hope is that people take this problem seriously and do believe that they can start the momentum for this problem to begin healing. Help it along won't you?
In action and with passion,
Coach Katie
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Falling in Love with Yourself
Good morning,
I am attracting a lot of people lately with some self confidence issues. We all know what that means...I must be struggling somewhere in this department as well. Confidence comes in many packages. Everyone waivers at one point or another. Similarly, everyone is super confident at different times in their lives.
One area I am excited to share some information on is self confidence on the outside. Did you know that you can trick your psyche into thinking things? Sure! We all tell ourselves little lies and little truths. It's too bad we often don't even know we are doing it. Try to tune your awareness into what you tell yourself when you start to doubt and when you feel uplifted. Where does that little voice come from? If you can trick yourself into believing you are confident, that story will start to seep in through your skin, down to your bones and into your soul. Once you believe it, you will start to radiate that positive, confident energy and draw like minded people to you.
So...let's begin! Lately this has not been a hard task for me - falling in love with myself on the outside. For example, I enjoy kayaking and last night I went on a moonlight kayak with a few friends. As I was paddling, I looked down at the water and caught a glimpse of my arm where it bends at the elbow. That soft, subtle, womanly bend as it hollows out on the inside. It was sunset and the water was calm. As I paddled, I looked down and thought, "I am completely in love with the inside of my elbow right now." Is that crazy? Such a small part of me, yet I found such beauty in it. It was a personal thought, a truth I embedded into my heart. I share it as an example of falling in love with myself. It's not ego-based, it's not self-centered. It fed me and gave me outer confidence.
Everyday, find something new to fall in with on your body or in your actions. Consciously, but privately, tell yourself what that something is and why you love it. Go into detail. Look yourself in the eye in the mirror. Eventually, this spreads to the inside because the more you notice that you appreciate about yourself, the deeper you go. Before long, you'll be having inner dialogue about loving the way you are able to stand in line at the grocery store in patience. You will be loving things like your patience! How often do we admire things like that in other people? We just don't give ourselves enough credit. Have fun with it and tell yourself all of the positive ways you admire yourself on a daily basis. This slowly transforms your inner truths and your negative beliefs about yourself. Don't be surprised if it alters things like your posture and your ability to carry conversation.
Confidence is an interesting topic. It's an inward dialogue, but an outer show. Love yourself. From the inside out and the outside in. Find the root of the lies you tell yourself and find a way to flip the story. You are unique. You have gifts to offer the world that other people will benefit from. Share them, don't keep them locked up. Find something directly related to you to fall in love with today.
In beauty and confidence,
Coach Katie
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Magnetic Attraction. Letting Your Light Shine.
Have you ever had one of those weeks where everyone seems to want to be around you? It could be a stranger in the grocery store, out of touch friends, people who used to be acquaintances, and on and on. Suddenly, your magnetic force is on high and you are pulling everyone into your world.
I’d like to share a personal story of mine on this topic. Not too long ago, my own coach and I worked on forming a mantra when I was feeling less than attractive. This mantra was meant to be something I would say to myself in order to be present in the moment. After a lot of missing the mark, my wording boiled down to: MY LIGHT SHINES NOW. I wanted to be this bright, shiny, glowing light that people wanted to be around. I started putting myself out there, having informal parties and really putting effort into my relationships. My reward has been an inundation of love, support and laughter.
I am having so much fun playing with this concept of creating reality. Wishing for something isn't going to do it. It's just not enough. You have to step into the spotlight for anyone to be able to see you. This requires action. It's not about being the center of attention, or stealing the limelight. It's about really allowing people to see you and, of course, I mean the real you.
Marianne Williamson once wrote, "Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do." What does this mean? Children don’t know how to be anything else. They are who they are. They ask the silly questions, they say the innocent things, they cry when they feel like it and they laugh when they feel like it. If we could all be so real, the world would be a much more understanding place.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. If you are minimizing yourself, you are not being yourself. How can you expect anyone around you to really “get” you? Being a magnetic force is about being authentic, but not being selfish. If your intentions are purely to gain attention, it’s not enough. That fades. Being authentic attracts people who balance you.
By doing so, you are putting yourself in the light. In fact, you create the light. NOW people will see and appreciate you. Learn to love the mystery of human interaction, listen to the words people say to you and listen to your own words. Radiate your own authentic light and there is no stopping you.
Ending Marianne Williamson’s quote is this: “And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.” Go inspire others today to uncover their hidden light. It starts with you.
Until next time,
Coach Katie
I’d like to share a personal story of mine on this topic. Not too long ago, my own coach and I worked on forming a mantra when I was feeling less than attractive. This mantra was meant to be something I would say to myself in order to be present in the moment. After a lot of missing the mark, my wording boiled down to: MY LIGHT SHINES NOW. I wanted to be this bright, shiny, glowing light that people wanted to be around. I started putting myself out there, having informal parties and really putting effort into my relationships. My reward has been an inundation of love, support and laughter.
I am having so much fun playing with this concept of creating reality. Wishing for something isn't going to do it. It's just not enough. You have to step into the spotlight for anyone to be able to see you. This requires action. It's not about being the center of attention, or stealing the limelight. It's about really allowing people to see you and, of course, I mean the real you.
Marianne Williamson once wrote, "Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do." What does this mean? Children don’t know how to be anything else. They are who they are. They ask the silly questions, they say the innocent things, they cry when they feel like it and they laugh when they feel like it. If we could all be so real, the world would be a much more understanding place.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. If you are minimizing yourself, you are not being yourself. How can you expect anyone around you to really “get” you? Being a magnetic force is about being authentic, but not being selfish. If your intentions are purely to gain attention, it’s not enough. That fades. Being authentic attracts people who balance you.
By doing so, you are putting yourself in the light. In fact, you create the light. NOW people will see and appreciate you. Learn to love the mystery of human interaction, listen to the words people say to you and listen to your own words. Radiate your own authentic light and there is no stopping you.
Ending Marianne Williamson’s quote is this: “And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.” Go inspire others today to uncover their hidden light. It starts with you.
Until next time,
Coach Katie
Monday, June 12, 2006
Finding Your Future Groove
It's hard to think ahead, to plan for the future. We often hear, 'enjoy today, be in the moment, but be responsible, plan ahead.' How do we accomplish all of this? I'll give you an outline for a way to find your future groove. Once you've completed the outline, it's important to revisit it often. Maybe once a month, maybe once a week depending on how detailed you get. Set goals for the future that are rewarding and achievable. You'll only get frustrated if you can't reach your goals because they were set too lofty.
Now, sit back and think about how you'd like to be in 20 years. I do mean how. What type of person do you want to be? Are you still working? Retired? Volunteering? Are you happy and relaxed or are you busy and challenged? Who is around you? Where are you living? Give this some serious thought. Just daydream for a little bit. Again, make sure you are being realistic. Would you really be happy on a 50 foot schooner? Do you even know how to navigate one? Be realistic...it's your groove!
It's time to write these dreams down. Take out a piece of paper and separate it into four quandrants. In the first, write Relationships. Fill that section in with all you hope to have in 20 years regarding a mate, friends and family.
Once you are done, go to the next quandrant and write Finances. Fill it up with all that you want financially (realistically) in 20 years. Any savings, stocks, bonds, IRA's. The works. Write it all out. Is there any money you want to give away? Charity? College funds? Vacation?
Next is Personal. Here, write down what you would personally like to achieve in the next 20 years. Education, hobbies, travel, etc. Get it down on paper.
The last quandrant is Career. What job will you hold in 20 years? President of the company or might you have started your own company? Are you retired and working part time somewhere? Are you firmly planted in a job you love? Have you made a name for yourself? Write it all down.
Now, you have your visual tool for your future. How are you feeling about it? Are these tasks that you really want? If so, wonderful. Writing them down has released them. Before they were just thoughts in your head. Now, they are afiirmations on paper. Revisit this often as you start to take steps toward achieving your goals. Soon, you'll find that some of the items will happen on their own.
Enjoy this time of creation in your life!
Coach Katie
Now, sit back and think about how you'd like to be in 20 years. I do mean how. What type of person do you want to be? Are you still working? Retired? Volunteering? Are you happy and relaxed or are you busy and challenged? Who is around you? Where are you living? Give this some serious thought. Just daydream for a little bit. Again, make sure you are being realistic. Would you really be happy on a 50 foot schooner? Do you even know how to navigate one? Be realistic...it's your groove!
It's time to write these dreams down. Take out a piece of paper and separate it into four quandrants. In the first, write Relationships. Fill that section in with all you hope to have in 20 years regarding a mate, friends and family.
Once you are done, go to the next quandrant and write Finances. Fill it up with all that you want financially (realistically) in 20 years. Any savings, stocks, bonds, IRA's. The works. Write it all out. Is there any money you want to give away? Charity? College funds? Vacation?
Next is Personal. Here, write down what you would personally like to achieve in the next 20 years. Education, hobbies, travel, etc. Get it down on paper.
The last quandrant is Career. What job will you hold in 20 years? President of the company or might you have started your own company? Are you retired and working part time somewhere? Are you firmly planted in a job you love? Have you made a name for yourself? Write it all down.
Now, you have your visual tool for your future. How are you feeling about it? Are these tasks that you really want? If so, wonderful. Writing them down has released them. Before they were just thoughts in your head. Now, they are afiirmations on paper. Revisit this often as you start to take steps toward achieving your goals. Soon, you'll find that some of the items will happen on their own.
Enjoy this time of creation in your life!
Coach Katie
Friday, June 09, 2006
Power of Words
Underestimating the power of words in any relationship is dangerous. My intention today is not to talk about negative or hurtful words, but rather the words of the heart. How often are those spoken? Some are very open with their feelings, sharing their deepest respect and admiration for those close to them. Others, think it but never speak it.
Often, we assume the people that mean the most to us know it. But do they really? We might think of them often and appreciate them silently but when it comes to verbalizing our thoughts, we become mute. I'd like to challenge you today to speak up. Tell someone close to you what they mean to you. Tell a stranger you like their smile or their hair. Have a heart talk over the weekend with someone who means the world to you. You won't only make their day, but you will strengthen that relationship as well. Help them to understand their significance for you.
Often, we assume the people that mean the most to us know it. But do they really? We might think of them often and appreciate them silently but when it comes to verbalizing our thoughts, we become mute. I'd like to challenge you today to speak up. Tell someone close to you what they mean to you. Tell a stranger you like their smile or their hair. Have a heart talk over the weekend with someone who means the world to you. You won't only make their day, but you will strengthen that relationship as well. Help them to understand their significance for you.
Power of Words
Underestimating the power of words in any relationship is dangerous. My intention today is not to talk about negative or hurtful words, but rather the words of the heart. How often are those spoken? Some are very open with their feelings, sharing their deepest respect and admiration for those close to them. Others, think it but never speak it.
Often, we assume the people that mean the most to us know it. But do they really? We might think of them often and appreciate them silently but when it comes to verbalizing our thoughts, we become mute. I'd like to challenge you today to speak up. Tell someone close to you what they mean to you. Tell a stranger you like their smile or their hair. Have a heart talk over the weekend with someone who means the world to you. You won't only make their day, but you will strengthen that relationship as well. Help them to understand their significance for you.
Often, we assume the people that mean the most to us know it. But do they really? We might think of them often and appreciate them silently but when it comes to verbalizing our thoughts, we become mute. I'd like to challenge you today to speak up. Tell someone close to you what they mean to you. Tell a stranger you like their smile or their hair. Have a heart talk over the weekend with someone who means the world to you. You won't only make their day, but you will strengthen that relationship as well. Help them to understand their significance for you.
Monday, June 05, 2006
Abundance...of Attitude.
“Abundance is, in large part, an attitude.” -Sue Patton Thoele
What a truth that statement is! Living from a place of abundance is also a choice. Each day contains a choice about whether we wake up in control of our day, or dreading the path we have already set in motion. Having an abundance of favorable tasks, friends and love each day is our choice.
Abundance is such a tangible topic because it contains so many truths.
Abundance is a free gift to give. Abundance can be donated by means of time, love, energy, attention or even thanks. Having it allows you to share freely with others to increase their reserves. Have you ever dealt with a particularly stressful day, feeling stretched far too thin? Of course you have. On these days we often find ourselves running into the perfect person at the most opportune time. It could be the person who smiled and held the door, an old friend sending a quick e-mail, or a family member with some good news. In turn, each of us have offered this gift to others as well. You may not recognize the moment when you give it, but be assured it is appreciated. Creating emotional abundance allows each of us to be authentic, which invites more positive emotion each day.
Often, you have to give it to receive it. When you give of your own, you increase the abundance of others. Call it karma, call it destiny, but whether you are giving monetarily or emotionally, it often comes back to you. Giving it out and witnessing when and how it comes back creates awareness around the pattern of abundant giving which breeds reciprocation. Sometimes, the only reciprocation you need is a ‘thank you.’
It has to do with gratitude. We always have abundance, yet often we don’t recognize it. Our focus is often on what we want next, instead of what we have now. I’m sure your fridge is pretty well stocked, your belly seldom empty, your hair often washed, your love tank often full and your next paycheck often expected. Your life is already abundant. Remembering to be grateful for the abundance already in existence has become an afterthought. What if we thought in terms of abundant gratefulness? What if we were grateful for the lack of traffic on the way into work? Or, grateful for the fact that our cars run well or our roofs are not leaky? What if we were grateful for the fact that our eye appointment was just a checkup instead of an emergency? How different would your attitude toward abundance be then?
Abundance can make our lives simpler. Sure, having a large sum of money in our bank accounts creates an easier lifestyle. Think smaller though. What if you had enough toilet paper for the next six months? Filling up on the little things can reduce the number of trips to the store and increase the amount of time you have for the things you really want to do. Living in abundance is living more simply. Stock up on what you can now, so you can enjoy more free time and give more freely of yourself. When you aren’t stressed about all the “stuff” you have to do, it’s easier to be present in the moment.
“Abundance is, in large part, an attitude.” -Sue Patton Thoele
Attitudes shift with perspective. Rod Stryker, meditation teacher and founder of Pure Yoga, states: “You cannot attain what you already have.” Center yourself with this thought. Once your mind recognizes it is already abundant with love and peace, so then, is your life. Now, that’s an abundant attitude.
Until next time,
Coach Katie
What a truth that statement is! Living from a place of abundance is also a choice. Each day contains a choice about whether we wake up in control of our day, or dreading the path we have already set in motion. Having an abundance of favorable tasks, friends and love each day is our choice.
Abundance is such a tangible topic because it contains so many truths.
Abundance is a free gift to give. Abundance can be donated by means of time, love, energy, attention or even thanks. Having it allows you to share freely with others to increase their reserves. Have you ever dealt with a particularly stressful day, feeling stretched far too thin? Of course you have. On these days we often find ourselves running into the perfect person at the most opportune time. It could be the person who smiled and held the door, an old friend sending a quick e-mail, or a family member with some good news. In turn, each of us have offered this gift to others as well. You may not recognize the moment when you give it, but be assured it is appreciated. Creating emotional abundance allows each of us to be authentic, which invites more positive emotion each day.
Often, you have to give it to receive it. When you give of your own, you increase the abundance of others. Call it karma, call it destiny, but whether you are giving monetarily or emotionally, it often comes back to you. Giving it out and witnessing when and how it comes back creates awareness around the pattern of abundant giving which breeds reciprocation. Sometimes, the only reciprocation you need is a ‘thank you.’
It has to do with gratitude. We always have abundance, yet often we don’t recognize it. Our focus is often on what we want next, instead of what we have now. I’m sure your fridge is pretty well stocked, your belly seldom empty, your hair often washed, your love tank often full and your next paycheck often expected. Your life is already abundant. Remembering to be grateful for the abundance already in existence has become an afterthought. What if we thought in terms of abundant gratefulness? What if we were grateful for the lack of traffic on the way into work? Or, grateful for the fact that our cars run well or our roofs are not leaky? What if we were grateful for the fact that our eye appointment was just a checkup instead of an emergency? How different would your attitude toward abundance be then?
Abundance can make our lives simpler. Sure, having a large sum of money in our bank accounts creates an easier lifestyle. Think smaller though. What if you had enough toilet paper for the next six months? Filling up on the little things can reduce the number of trips to the store and increase the amount of time you have for the things you really want to do. Living in abundance is living more simply. Stock up on what you can now, so you can enjoy more free time and give more freely of yourself. When you aren’t stressed about all the “stuff” you have to do, it’s easier to be present in the moment.
“Abundance is, in large part, an attitude.” -Sue Patton Thoele
Attitudes shift with perspective. Rod Stryker, meditation teacher and founder of Pure Yoga, states: “You cannot attain what you already have.” Center yourself with this thought. Once your mind recognizes it is already abundant with love and peace, so then, is your life. Now, that’s an abundant attitude.
Until next time,
Coach Katie
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Getting Happy with the Big Picture
Climbing at Seneca Rocks this weekend was an eye-opening experience for me. In front of me stood this massive 900 foot mountain. And I was going to climb it. It was my biggest climb yet and I was so excited. Climbing is such a metaphor for life. It takes a huge amount of physical and mental perseverance. Sitting on top of that mountain reaffirmed for me that the bigger picture is often much larger than we can imagine. Climbing up I knew there would be a beautiful view at the top. My reward would most certainly be a lovely landscape and my sense of accomplishment.
My lesson, however, was much bigger than the view. Not only could I see for miles, but I suddenly felt very small. This sensation has occurred before on a mountaintop, but it was much more intense this time. I found myself reflecting on the bigger picture in my own life. We often focus so much on the small details, those hand and foot holds to keep scraping upwards. How often do we stop to think that the big picture, the lovely view, is always surrounding us?
I'll give you another example. Last December I had a serious relationship end. It was a hard time for me to try to promote my business, keep my spirits up and push myself. I'm in a much better place now, but you know what? Not all that much has changed. My business is still chugging along, my friends are still loving and supportive and my lifestyle is pretty much the same. Back in December I couldn't see how full my life was. I only saw the void where my happiness once was. Now, my source of happiness lies within myself, my big picture is what I had already created around me. I can see it now. It's tangible and it's real. Back in December I could only see the void and the huge mountain I had left to climb before I could again reclaim the good things in my life.
What are the small holds you are focusing on and how will you push off of them to keep moving forward? Take some time today to reflect on your big picture and how gorgeous the view really is. Breath taking and moving as you realize and reclaim all that you have created around you. What views will you set your eyes on next?
Enjoy the journey,
Coach Katie
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Your Best Self
I started this post thinking it would be aimed at the ladies today. However, I would be willing to assume that many guys face this challenge as well. I'm talking about being your best self. I have lost count of how many friends and clients have confided that they feel less than adequate. I have to admit, sometimes I feel it, too. You know how every now and then you get a small glimpse of your true self? You leave a group feeling more than energized, you take a walk feeling totally at peace and open to life, you help out a friend and think THAT is my genuine self. So...where does it go during those in between times?
It doesn't go anywhere. That feeling is always within you. Did you hear that? Always. What changes is your environment. One minute you are thrilled to be around people because those people support your values and love you no matter what. Then, your environment changes and you are in a room of strangers or people who don't quite "get you." That's when we tend to change our behaviour to fit into our environment. Here is an important truth: you can't please everyone all the time and you can't be "up" all the time.
If we were "up" all the time we'd have nothing to compare our low moods to. Each of us is unique and has a special voice. We each have a message to share with the world. I would venture to say we each have many messages to share with the world. Think of how much wisdom you have gained from others. Wisdom is reciprocal and either you have passed that on at some point, or shared some of your own unique wisdom.
Bring yourself back to a place where you were most at peace, where you felt most authentic. Where was that place? What contributed to your peace? What about that environment supported your authenticity? Live there when you are uncomfortable. Feel that place. Bring yourself back to center with it so you can speak your true voice. When you are doing that, two things happen:
1. You are more attractive because you are authentic. People can't help but be attracted to authentic people.
2. You don't "need" the people who aren't attracted to you. Folks that just don't get it don't really matter anymore. You don't need to pursue their friendship or their company if you don't feel a connection. Why not? Because you know you need to surround yourself with people who understand and support you.
Now, it's important to remember that not everyone will get you every step of the way. Remember that your friends are human and make mistakes, too. However, they also respect and value your authentic self. They push you to be better. This is reciprocal by the way. So, who are the people in your life that understand you and push you to be your best self? Thank them today. Then plan a good night out to be lifted up and spirited. Have fun with this!
Peace and authenticity,
Coach Katie
It doesn't go anywhere. That feeling is always within you. Did you hear that? Always. What changes is your environment. One minute you are thrilled to be around people because those people support your values and love you no matter what. Then, your environment changes and you are in a room of strangers or people who don't quite "get you." That's when we tend to change our behaviour to fit into our environment. Here is an important truth: you can't please everyone all the time and you can't be "up" all the time.
If we were "up" all the time we'd have nothing to compare our low moods to. Each of us is unique and has a special voice. We each have a message to share with the world. I would venture to say we each have many messages to share with the world. Think of how much wisdom you have gained from others. Wisdom is reciprocal and either you have passed that on at some point, or shared some of your own unique wisdom.
Bring yourself back to a place where you were most at peace, where you felt most authentic. Where was that place? What contributed to your peace? What about that environment supported your authenticity? Live there when you are uncomfortable. Feel that place. Bring yourself back to center with it so you can speak your true voice. When you are doing that, two things happen:
1. You are more attractive because you are authentic. People can't help but be attracted to authentic people.
2. You don't "need" the people who aren't attracted to you. Folks that just don't get it don't really matter anymore. You don't need to pursue their friendship or their company if you don't feel a connection. Why not? Because you know you need to surround yourself with people who understand and support you.
Now, it's important to remember that not everyone will get you every step of the way. Remember that your friends are human and make mistakes, too. However, they also respect and value your authentic self. They push you to be better. This is reciprocal by the way. So, who are the people in your life that understand you and push you to be your best self? Thank them today. Then plan a good night out to be lifted up and spirited. Have fun with this!
Peace and authenticity,
Coach Katie
Monday, May 22, 2006
Fuel for the Soul
After a relaxing weekend of climbing in the mountains, I am inspired to write about finding inspiration. As soon as we started driving into the mountains, I immediately settled into my seat and relaxed. For me, being in nature is an inspiration. I enjoy feeling the damp air, seeing the plush shades of green, hearing the wind in the trees and smelling the pure air. I love walking down a path and not knowing exactly what my eyes will fall upon next, or climbing and not knowing what view will be above the treetops. Being out there ignites every one of my senses. It's a wonderful escape for me from the busy city. My goal is to own property in the mountains. For now, they are my escape. Any time I am feeling out of balance, I plan a trip.
What is your escape? For some it is driving down a long windy road, for some it is being in the mountains or at the beach, for others walking around a busy city watching people all day. Where do you find you are most inspired? Describe it in terms of your senses. How often do you allow yourself this escape? Do others join you or is it most effective for you to be alone?
Try to narrow down exactly what that environment inspires in you. Think about the way it makes you feel. Where can you incorporate some of that feeling in your life? For instance, my office is a very mossy green color, very naturistic because that color evokes the feeling I have when I am in the woods on a spring day. Everything I surround myself with is earthy and natural colored. Can you bring some of your ideal environment into your everyday life? Think in terms of colors, sounds, smells, etc.
Enjoy your day today. Plan your next trip to bring balance back into your life. Use it as a little escape and some alone time to rejuvenate.
Inspiration and love,
Coach Katie
What is your escape? For some it is driving down a long windy road, for some it is being in the mountains or at the beach, for others walking around a busy city watching people all day. Where do you find you are most inspired? Describe it in terms of your senses. How often do you allow yourself this escape? Do others join you or is it most effective for you to be alone?
Try to narrow down exactly what that environment inspires in you. Think about the way it makes you feel. Where can you incorporate some of that feeling in your life? For instance, my office is a very mossy green color, very naturistic because that color evokes the feeling I have when I am in the woods on a spring day. Everything I surround myself with is earthy and natural colored. Can you bring some of your ideal environment into your everyday life? Think in terms of colors, sounds, smells, etc.
Enjoy your day today. Plan your next trip to bring balance back into your life. Use it as a little escape and some alone time to rejuvenate.
Inspiration and love,
Coach Katie
Friday, May 19, 2006
Passionate about our jobs
HA! It's completely impossible to be passionate about a job. No one really likes getting up and going to work day after day. Honestly, jobs are just a means to support the mortgage, car loan and student loans. Jobs offer a little extra cash to do some traveling, maybe a headache or two and perhaps a fight between myself and the ones I love. I can't do anything about the job I have, I'm stuck with it.
Do you agree with these statements? These are some of the lies we tell ourselves about having a job. If you were in a relationship and couldn't stand the other person...would you stay? My point is, why are you spending 40+ hours per week of your life doing something you don't like, respect or enjoy? Are you waiting for something better? Settling for what you have?
OR...are you really looking for that ideal daytime activity that will energize you...and pay you at the same time! I know, impossible right? I can't say I agree. There are people out there who love what they do everyday. It is possible. For most, jobs are necessary, yes. How intentional are you being about your search?
When I say search, I don't mean monster.com or careerfinder.com. I mean searching within yourself. Each of us already knows our purpose. I know it sounds crazy. The problem is that through our lives we have been asked to stop dreaming, to follow educational standards and to hide our true thoughts. Starting to sound familiar?
When I went to college, I studied graphic design. I liked it...but I didn't love it. I knew it wasn't my passion or my purpose. It paid the bills, it nurtured my creative side, it allowed me to have fun. So, what was the problem? It didn't fulfill ME. At the end of the day, I was tired, stressed and unfulfilled. I began researching other jobs. Everything that I took an interest in brought peace to the lives of others. Jobs such as massage therapy, yoga instructor, etc caught my attention. As soon as I started researching these paths, I attended a tele-class led by a life coach. I began researching what coaching was and I just knew that was my calling. That's when I began working with my own coach to see what the process was like. Then, I went back to school to study coaching. Before long, I started my own business. My own searching pulled me foward on a path that I didn't question. Every step led to someone or something who offered a gift in the form of advice, suggestion or knowledge.
I want to ask that you take some time today to explore your inner desires. Reflect on what jobs have peaked your interest at some point in your life and what common thread ties them together. Ask yourself why you don't like your current job and what might make you enjoy it more. Start researching, attending seminars, etc. Expand your learning and the right field will reveal itself. There are many ways to uncover the truth about where your calling is. This is the tip of the iceberg.
If you do feel stuck in your job, if you are drained by your work, if you are too tired to enjoy life by the time 5:00 comes around, my goal is for you to say to yourself: "I deserve more than this." Your life is too precious to be wasted. Your time is too valuable. I assure you that you deserve more if you are unhappy. Your spirit requires more. Take a step today, even it's only one, toward something better. Talk to someone new about what they do, read a magazine you wouldn't normally pick up and see what stands out at you or go online and type in a keyword that always brings you energy. Whatever it is, be intentional about it. Plant the seed that starts growing and see what kind of fruit you can reap from it later. Every person we encounter has a message for us, every experience has a lesson. Start listening.
Get serious about this change if it's really what you want. The only person that make it happen is YOU.
With gratitude and intention,
Coach Katie
Do you agree with these statements? These are some of the lies we tell ourselves about having a job. If you were in a relationship and couldn't stand the other person...would you stay? My point is, why are you spending 40+ hours per week of your life doing something you don't like, respect or enjoy? Are you waiting for something better? Settling for what you have?
OR...are you really looking for that ideal daytime activity that will energize you...and pay you at the same time! I know, impossible right? I can't say I agree. There are people out there who love what they do everyday. It is possible. For most, jobs are necessary, yes. How intentional are you being about your search?
When I say search, I don't mean monster.com or careerfinder.com. I mean searching within yourself. Each of us already knows our purpose. I know it sounds crazy. The problem is that through our lives we have been asked to stop dreaming, to follow educational standards and to hide our true thoughts. Starting to sound familiar?
When I went to college, I studied graphic design. I liked it...but I didn't love it. I knew it wasn't my passion or my purpose. It paid the bills, it nurtured my creative side, it allowed me to have fun. So, what was the problem? It didn't fulfill ME. At the end of the day, I was tired, stressed and unfulfilled. I began researching other jobs. Everything that I took an interest in brought peace to the lives of others. Jobs such as massage therapy, yoga instructor, etc caught my attention. As soon as I started researching these paths, I attended a tele-class led by a life coach. I began researching what coaching was and I just knew that was my calling. That's when I began working with my own coach to see what the process was like. Then, I went back to school to study coaching. Before long, I started my own business. My own searching pulled me foward on a path that I didn't question. Every step led to someone or something who offered a gift in the form of advice, suggestion or knowledge.
I want to ask that you take some time today to explore your inner desires. Reflect on what jobs have peaked your interest at some point in your life and what common thread ties them together. Ask yourself why you don't like your current job and what might make you enjoy it more. Start researching, attending seminars, etc. Expand your learning and the right field will reveal itself. There are many ways to uncover the truth about where your calling is. This is the tip of the iceberg.
If you do feel stuck in your job, if you are drained by your work, if you are too tired to enjoy life by the time 5:00 comes around, my goal is for you to say to yourself: "I deserve more than this." Your life is too precious to be wasted. Your time is too valuable. I assure you that you deserve more if you are unhappy. Your spirit requires more. Take a step today, even it's only one, toward something better. Talk to someone new about what they do, read a magazine you wouldn't normally pick up and see what stands out at you or go online and type in a keyword that always brings you energy. Whatever it is, be intentional about it. Plant the seed that starts growing and see what kind of fruit you can reap from it later. Every person we encounter has a message for us, every experience has a lesson. Start listening.
Get serious about this change if it's really what you want. The only person that make it happen is YOU.
With gratitude and intention,
Coach Katie
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