Clean Out the Clutter...Stop the Madness! Pass it on.

With the holidays rapidly approaching, we're all on overdrive. Scurrying to get presents on time, in the mail and ordered, we wait in line, in traffic and on the phone. We're late to everything because everyone is rushing around doing the same thing! It's madness out there and if you're anything like me, it's madness within your own house, too. In my hustle to get out the door to various holiday parties last week I left cooking utensils on the counter, wrapping paper on the floor and a various assortment of holiday trimmings scattered throughout my house. Santa has officially ransacked my lovely home.

I woke up this morning, completely geared up to get a full day of work done, except I couldn't find my files, my papers or my mind. I figured I must have left it with the kitchen utensils, right next to the coffee pot on the counter. So, I filled my cup and slowly waded back into my office, trying to decide which pile of leftover mess to tackle first.

When our lives get cluttered so do our minds. Ever notice how you are more forgetful around the holidays? Easily distracted? Quickly irritated? You're cluttered. Stop the madness. Seriously. Give yourself a few moments throughout the day to breathe in and breathe out with thought. Focus on your breath, focus on something that centers you and let it go. Life is far more accessible when your own mind is up to the challenge. Let alone your spirit!

Start with the messy rooms in your house and your brain will begin to feel less cluttered. Open space, open mind. Now, take your dog for a walk, because if you're anything like me, your pets are feeding off of your anxious energy and driving you mad! Tired dog, happy owner. I have a wise friend who says that.

Now, take some more deep breathing soul treatments and make a list of things that need to get done. Remove the stress of remembering it all and put it down on paper. Decide which needs to be first and get going. Enter the snow globe of swirling flakes *ahem* snowflakes and don't mind the hustle. The new, centered and profoundly calm you can now walk through the streets of downtown and not be bothered by the madness that has infected other holiday goers.

Gifting yourself with a positive, clean environment allows you to give back far more than your checkbook can. Caring, content, courteous you is making someone's holiday right now with a smile and breath of calm, fresh air. Pass it on.

Happy Holidays and Good Cheer to you and yours,
Coach Katie

Unexpected Moments

Unexpected meetings with friends, lucky opportunities, surprise phone calls. These are the little details of life that make it interesting and meaningful. They serve as a reality check for me to experience the magic flowing quietly through my existence. I've had quite a few run-ins lately with unexpected moments. Every one makes me more and more thankful for this beautiful life I've lived so far. Think back to the last time you had an unexpected meeting, or a lucky opportunity.

Frankly, I don't believe in luck. I believe things happen for a reason. We heighten our awareness around something we want and when the time is right *boom* it's knocking on our door. My favorite of the 28 Principles of Attraction is to create a vacuum to pull you forward. Instead of pushing so hard for something, you strategically place yourself in front of the opportunity so it comes to you. Here's an example:

Say you want to paint for a living. You're passionate about it, you know your talent, you believe in your skill. Instead of telling everyone about your dream, knocking downthe door of every art gallery and paying tons of money for advertisement, make it easy on yourself. Research your key players in the art world that can speak to the audience you wish to reach. Create an oppotunity to get in front of them and *boom* instant word of mouth advertising...or a better connection that will create another open door, and another, and another. You get the point.

Don't force things. Follow your dream where it wants to go. Remain focused, but choose the right keys along the way. Swing those doors wide open and most likely, someone or something will be there with your next checkpoint...pulling your forward. Create opportunity today! Ask for what you want. I practice this with you.

Enjoy the weekend,
Coach Katie

Fulfilling Life

I'd like to share a resource with you. This is a great way to keep account of what you would like to do, what you have accomplished and what you are working towards.

www.SuperViva.com allows users to make life lists of dreams, goals and aspirations. "To-do" lists for life if you will. It's a great tool to keep all of your dreams in one place! Enjoy!

Choosing Your Path

Last night, I settled into my bed with my rice paper light on above me. I had decided to start a book by Maya Angelou called, "Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now." Hooked by the first few pages, I stayed up until the tender hours of the morning to finish it. Seldom do I read a book cover to cover in one sitting, but this one was filled with so much wisdom, I couldn't put it down. I'd like to share a little piece of Maya Angelou's voice with you today in hopes that you, too, absorb this powerful message.

"Each of us has the right and the responsibility to assess the roads which lie ahead, and those over which we have traveled, and if the future road looms ominous or unpromising, and the roads back uninviting, then we need to gather our resolve and, carrying only the necessary baggage, step off that road into another direction. If the new choice is also unpalatable, without embarrassment, we must be ready to change that as well."
Maya Angelou, "Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now," page 24

What do your roads look like? Are you proud of the ones you have chosen, which have delivered you to the location you are at now? Are you excited about the direction the one in front of you leads? Do you need to step off the path you are on to create your own?

Every once in a while, we clearly see the position we are in and can take into full account the scenery around us. If we are content with that place, it can be a very satisfying moment. If the environment we are in makes us anxious or angry, it is then that we need to shift directions and move against the wind. We should enjoy the journey.

Enjoy your path today,
Coach Katie

Quote for the Day

"Opportunity is often missed because we are broadcasting when we should be tuning in." - Anonymous

Where do you need to be tuning in?

Generational Gap...What Do Our Young Generations Have to Offer?

It's fair to say that generational gaps will always be a source of sour faces. Comparing stories of uphill journeys in the snow both ways only shows the push of ego against ego. Each generation has found their own secret to happiness and wants to stake their claim. So, which generations have come the farthest and what do our younger generations have to offer?

Marketing gurus are learning that Baby Boomers are becoming their newest consumer. Moving into their "third-age," as it's being coined, these mid-lifers are looking for new hobbies, interests and careers to keep them fulfilled as they enter a revised version of retirement. Most Baby Boomers no longer want to retire completely. Instead, they are seeking careers that fulfill their passions and keep them busy while still allowing them time to play. Marika and Howard Stone have written: "Too Young to Retire," a valuable resource for Baby Boomers faced with the dilemna of "what do I do next?"

Generation X has been dealt a different hand. Pressed to work hard for what they want, many have put family and lifestyle on hold in favor of their careers. Women have forced their way through glass ceilings at all costs. With the cards on the table, some are finding that they have a choice: start a family or continue with the career they have worked so hard to build. It's a very real problem that Lia Macko and Kerry Rubin write about in: "Mid-Life Crisis at 30-How the Stakes Have Changed for a New Generation and What to do About It."

Critics come down hard on Generation Y saying that they want instant success, more time off and less work. I think it's important to notice the need among this generation for healthy work-life balance. It is a lesson they learned from previous generations. From my research over the past year, I have found that most Generation Y workers feel they can get more done in less time thanks to advancements in technology. As a result, they often ask to use their extra time for personal reasons because they can finish the same amount of work in less time. Many are irreplaceable in their companies as they continue to increase productivity. In addition, this generation is starting their own companies, chasing their dreams and taking chances. Fear is an afterthought to success.

Business Week recently did an article on the most successful startups by this generation. It might surprise you.
http://www.businessweek.com/smallbiz/content/oct2006/sb20061030_754921.htm?link_position=link1

Learning from older generations, duplicating their success and failing to repeat their mistakes is smart business. Improving the system and creating a life we love to live is our responsibility. Perhaps we have something to learn from younger generations as well.

Childlike Innocence

I am taking some time off this weekend to visit with my parents. It reminds me of younger days when I blindly trusted my childhood innocence. It always makes me laugh when I catch myself back in one of those moments. A smile begins to spread across my face as I realize what is happening.

Usually it happens in the midst of friends. We're playing games, we are low on sleep or we've had one too many glasses of wine. Laughter among friends is the most beautiful sound - I read that somewhere. I try to pause in the middle of those giggle-fests to make a memory and cherish the moment.

My childhood innocence sneaks up on me even when I'm alone. I'll catch myself singing in the mirror, or sliding across the floor in my socks. Chuckling, I know it is a moment of pure pleasure. Silliness breeds grinning.

And grinning is never a bad thing.

One of my favorite movies has one constant quote throughout: "never loose your childlike innocence." I love that quote. Even though we're adults, we still need to be silly. It reminds us we're never too old to have fun. Spark your imagination.

Take this weekend to do something silly. Go jump in a puddle, go make breakfast for dinner, go have a silly string fight. Whatever you choose to do, be sure you are grinning from ear to ear and that your sides hurt from so much giggling.

Much love and laughter,
Coach Katie

Inspiration from Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou is a huge inspiration for me. Her words are solid and secure, like huge hardwoods with their roots buried deep in the ground. She has found her natural beauty, accepted her strongest gifts and overcome many trials in life.

Some quotes from Maya to inspire you today:

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song."

"The main thing in one's own private world is to try to laugh as much as you cry."

"Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it."

"Words mean more than what is set down on paper. It takes the human voice to infuse them with shades of deeper meaning."

"All great achievements require time."

"I believe that every person is born with talent."

I especially love that last one. Have a wonderful week,
Coach Katie

Never Stop Learning

Walking down endlessly long, poorly lit hallways lined with gray lockers was never my idea of an exciting place to learn. While I value those years and the knowledge I took with me, I much prefer the lessons absorbed before and after those years. After all, isn’t life just an ongoing apprenticeship with a few fleeting moments of mastery?

In our early years, we questioned little when it came to authority and often when it came to life. Our parents were usually right, you didn’t talk back to adults and life was full of possibility. We jumped in puddles to see the splash, we made telephones out of cups and string and we felt the grass between our toes often just because it felt good. We questioned everything from why the grass was green to why someone would be so mean to us.

I believe the reverse is true the older we get. Our authority figures are growing older and are now “old-fashioned or stuck in the past.” Our lives have become structured with habit, and summon very few energizing moments. In many ways, we’ve become numb.

I’ve said it often, “the more I learn, the less I know.” As a highly intelligent society, our minds are constantly bombarded with new technology, concepts and integrative thinking. As a result, we feel challenged and sometimes fulfilled. My challenge to you this month is to fulfill your personal desires through learning.

Sign up for a class today, listen to someone's advice, be a mentor. Do something for you, to help you learn a new topic or gain a new perspective.

Have a great weekend,
Coach Katie

P.S. This post is the beginning of my November newsletter. To read more, sign up at: www.energizeyourmoment.com

The More I Learn, the Less I Know

There is a kind of knowledge that can make you mindless.
There is a kind of intelligence that will leave you empowered.

Last night I went to see a lecture by Dr. Andrew Weil. He talked a lot about integrative medicine and what vitamins, supplements, etc are useful to maintaining and improving our health. He carried no notes, his leaned on the side of the podium like he was having a conversation with a good friend. The theater we were in was packed. HIs voice was clear and his words were fluent. Having no background in medicine, I understood what he was telling me, his words were clear. Delivering his talk was easy because he knew each fact, detail and story. His research is extensive, his travels have been far. I can't imagine knowing so much.

That hour and a half speech was a very healthy reminder for me. One I have often, but am astounded by it everytime.

The more I learn, the less I know. Each time I feel I've become an expert on a particular topic, I wake up to the realization that I've only captured a small slice of the knowledge available. To think that I've even come close to enlightenment is a fantasy. Sometimes I let myself live in that fantasy. Particularly when I've captured a great tool for personal empowerment. Realistically, my world has just opened up a little bit more. A tiny fragment of light coming in through a thousand doors still in front of me waiting eagerly to be opened at the right time.

In my opinion, knowledge works in two ways. It can open your mind to new possibilities, opportunities and higher thinking. OR, it can aid you in closing your mind to thinking there is only one right way. I try my best to remember that my world is limited by what I know and there is always more to learn. There is a kind of knowledge that can make you mindless.
There is a kind of intelligence that will leave you empowered.

That being said, two wonderful things come from limited knowledge. First, what you do learn will inspire action. By tipping off your interest on a particular topic, you attract others who can fortify that knowledge, or open new doors toward your goal. For instance, when I heard about coaching, I knew nothing about the field except that I was curious. That curiosity led to questions. From those questions, I met others who had hired coaches, which led to coaches who were practicing. From there I learned about the field, hired a coach and began taking classes to get certified. All from a simple curiosity.

Second on the list of empowerment that drives limited knowledge is a lack of understanding when it comes to failure. There is a reason they say "Hindsight is 20/20." How many choices would you have run screaming in the other direction from if you'd only known what the outcome would be? With limited knowledge before the leap of starting a business, getting into a relationship, taking a trip, accepting a job...you don't know failure. You have the highest expectations. While they don't always work out, you always learn a valuable lesson from the failures. In which case, they weren't failures at all. Many times you realize just what you're made of. They make you stronger and as a result, you have again increased your knowledge. When they do work out, it is often not in the way you expected. With that knowledge ahead of time, you may have limited your perception of your ability. Again, you've found out what you're made of.

I started off this post with these words and I'll end it that way, too:

There is a kind of knowledge that can make you mindless.
There is a kind of intelligence that will leave you empowered.

Don't limit yourself with knowledge today, let your heart have a say as well,
Coach Katie

Do What You Were Born To Do

I was listening to a song the other day. We all know that inspiration comes from countless sources. Music often inspires me, but this time I was touched by one line in particular. From a song called, Wagon Wheel, written by Bob Dylan with additional lyrics by Ketch Secor and performed by the Old Crow Medicine Show comes this verse:

Runnin' from the cold up in New England
I was born to be a fiddler in an old-time stringband
My baby plays the guitar
I pick a banjo now

The line that struck me was: I was born to be a fiddler in an old-time stringband

This is not your ordinary dream.

I would be willing to bet that quite often we have thoughts about what we would like to be, or do, or be known for. And then we push them aside for a more conventional path. What would you do if you didn't have to get paid? What dreams have you buried instead of owning up to?

Being a fiddler in an old-time stringband is neither lucrative, nor highly accepted (unless you are in a well-known band). This artist writes about someone who has followed their dream because deep down they felt that burning desire to do so. It is said with such a matter-of-fact tone.

Entertain your deepest, wildest, most outlandish dreams. Even if it's just for a moment. Talk about them, invite them back into your life. What do feel you were born to do?

Live in that certainty today,
Coach Katie

Take A Step, Move a Mile

Thousands of writers have written about it, thousands of friends have advised with it, thousands of inspirational speakers have promoted it...

IT is the theory that if you do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to move towards a goal you have, you will be closer to it. Why?
BECAUSE YOU ARE NO LONGER STANDING STILL.

Makes sense right? Martha Beck, author of Leaving the Saints, and contributor for O! The Oprah Magazine writes, "Your frustration comes not from a difficult choice but from the way you think you have to choose." Her first piece of advise about being happy is to do something. She says if that doesn't work, go do something else.

It kind of makes you laugh doesn't it? It seems so simple. To be happy...do something. Huh. That's not so hard. Our fears, our doubts and our inability to remain focused can be amazingly painful to our momentum. Do something today. Take that first scary step forward. Find that little twinge of excitement that comes from movement. Use that twinge to eventually create a flood of happiness into your life because you are actively pursuing what you WANT.

Start your momentum today,
Coach Katie

Sense-Sational Living

I think life can be quite pleasing to the appetite if we’re willing to experiment with the ingredients a little bit. Instead of following the traditional recipe – go to college, study hard, get married, start a family, maintain a career – Spice it up a bit! Add a pinch of thyme, a dash of old sage and a little hot “sass.”

I don’t know about you, but my senses demand to be used and appreciated. To me, living is not simply an act of getting up day after day and earning money to support my lifestyle. I like to nourish the little moments in between. Indulging in all of my senses makes me feel alive and aware. Allowing my attention to focus on what I am experiencing gives me a renewed sense of balance. Sometimes that involves a touchstone of some sort, sometimes a need to get away and yet other times it’s enough just to drum up a good memory.

Growing up I always wanted the toys that smelled good. My Mom always recalls how from the time I was 3 until I was 7, our house smelled like strawberry shortcake. Now, my house is filled with candles, though admittedly, none of them smell like strawberries. I crave candles with scents of eucalyptus, bergamot or sage. Something about those scents transport me into another place. One with history, wisdom and a story all it's own. Why is it that certain smells can propel you into the past? For me, it’s the smell of chocolate chip cookies baking. Instantly, I’m back in my mother’s kitchen, adding the flour and measuring out the brown sugar. Naturally, I make a point to bake cookies as much as possible.

When it comes to food, I’m a mixer. I mix my meat with the mashed potatoes and I spill gravy over onto my vegetables. I appreciate the combination of different tastes. Confusing my palate with different types of ethnic foods, or a new wine is actually quite a rush for me. Some flavors become habit, while others are a momentary treat. Personally, I savor the mornings when the coffee is measured out so perfectly I could drink 10 cups in spite of the uncontrollable foot shake that would result. Tasting food and drink, instead of rushing to finish is very important to me. Combining good food with good friends is the perfect recipe for a very satisfying meal.

With good friends always comes sincere touch. Have you ever encountered a stiff armed hugger? They hug you like suddenly their arms have turned to lead – cold and unable to bend. I like a good hug. So much can be said between two people without a word being exchanged. I cherish the hugs shared between good friends. Touch goes beyond physicality between two people though. Everyday we encounter millions of textures. How often do we notice? Nature cooks up the best texture in my opinion. Some of my favorites are grass between my toes, cool water racing over my skin and rough rock beneath my fingertips.

Nature also offers beautiful sounds. Listening to the bugs start their evening serenade as the day winds down and the evening begins is therapeutic for me. Sitting beside a river bed, I let my mind race with the sounds of the water flowing by. Also calming for me is hearing the wind blow over an open field on a spring day or howl through the trees during a gusty evening. Deafening thunderclaps from a passing storm remind me how safe I am in my home. Other sounds evoke emotions within me as well. Different types of music make my mood dance with rage, love or energy. To agree with Maya Angelou, the human voice is perhaps the most beautiful instrument of all. Laughter seasons my heart and sweet words drain stress from my day.

My mind often works in photographs and text. I am a creative soul, so I’ve always been visual. By the minute, my mind describes to me what my eyes soak in, almost like poetry. I have countless photographs stored away in my psyche. I can equally appreciate the gentle details of a tree trunk and a sweet moment observed between a loving couple. I relish the details. I notice the way a drop of rain hits a puddle rather than the amount of it falling from the sky. I see the look exchanged between two people instead of the event that is taking place in front of me. I favor my visual awareness more than any of my other four senses.

I consider myself rather adventurous in spirit, so I visit my senses quite often. I pause to understand how my surroundings feed each of my five senses. When I’m hiking, I slowly soak in the scenery that my eyes fall upon. As I climb up the side of a mountain, my sense of touch is the most acute as I search for my next hold. When I sit in my kayak during a moonlit paddle, I listen to the sound of the water gliding gently under my paddle.

Everyday our senses are overwhelmed with the experiences we put ourselves into. Each message we receive as a result evokes an emotion and each emotion determines an outcome. We’re hardly aware of it though. I prefer to slow things down, understand the ingredients of my surroundings and savor the delicious feast I can cook up in my everyday encounters.

Be aware today,
Coach Katie

Lost in search of a new job?

If you're reading this post it probably means you are either:
a. Unhappy with your job and yes, looking for a new one OR
b. Know someone who is unhappy with their job and looking for a new one OR
c. Just curious what I have to say in case something should happen and you might look for a new job

Either way, read on.

In this day of fast paced, "gotta make it," growing up too fast attitudes...we tend to find ourselves lost in choices. I talk a lot about choices, but this is particularly about career choices. You want the world, but you need two years experience. No one will hire you without it. SO...how does that work?? You were forced to choose a major in college and studied hard for four, five...maybe six years. Now you are miserable in a job you hate, but feel stuck because that is your only degree. You've been working for years and are simply burned out and needing a change. BUT where do you go? What's next on your path?

If any of this resonates with you, I understand. Let's explore it.

CAREER BOOST is my next group coaching series. For two months, or 6 sessions, we will explore what an ideal career means to you. Each week will be filled with new exercises and tools to help you clarify your vision of what's important and what's not to you in your career.

No matter where you are located, you can participate! I am holding these one hour sessions on a telephone bridge line, so you can call in from anywhere. Each Thursday at 7:00 p.m. (EST), we will meet for one hour. You'll walk away with more passion, awareness and focus in regards to the type of career that best suits you.

This series begins on October 12, 2006. Cost is $100.

For more information, contact Katie at: 704.552.2419 or katie@energizeyourmoment.com

www.energizeyourmoment.com

I'd love to see you there...

Enjoy the journey,
Coach Katie

Run Toward Your Dreams, Not Away

My biggest life lesson to date is that I am in control of my life. If things aren't going right, if I'm not happy with my friends, if I'm not content with my job...it's on me. My responsibility. My fault. Most importantly, those frustrating circumstances stem from MY CHOICES.

I choose to stay. I choose to go. I choose to keep certain people around. Why is there comfort in misery? If you're not careful, it can start to feel like home. My inspiration today is measured by my happiness. Small steps turn to big steps, and soon you are running at a full pace toward your dreams. It's trite, but practice makes perfect. Taking small steps to ask for what you need, going after what you want and really seeking the answers to your questions becomes habit. Settling for less is not an option.

If someone does something to bother you, tastefully confront them about it. No need to say 'yes' to everything and overextend yourself. Accept the invitations that you truly want. Surround yourself with friends that you want to be around, who challenge you and who inspire you. Make a living at a job that fulfills you. Chose to release yourself from the comfort of stability and take a chance.

Someone once told me that the hardest part of running is the first two miles. Beyond that your body is adjusted to the physical strain, your breathing has become regular and your energy is up. Creating energy in your lifestyle is very much the same. When you first begin to make a change, to question, it's exhilirating but exhausting. Your brain wants to convince itself that it's too tired, or too hard. Keep pushing forward and slowly it becomes easier.

At some point, you can even enjoy the brisk air that surrounds you and the constant movement of your body and mind. Your scenery is of your choosing and your pace is your own. How far you run and how fast is up to you.

Choose for yourself this week. Clear your mind and find your vision.
-Coach Katie

Dollars and Sense!

80% of lottery winners in the United States file bankruptcy within 5 years.

Soak that in for a moment. 80%! Jack Canfield cited this fact in his book, The Success Principles before he went on to introduce a theory that completely changed how I thought about money. I hope it has the same effect on you and your own self limiting beliefs.

According to Jack's theory, those lottery winners became accustomed to having a certain amount of money. Have you ever gotten a big bonus from work only to blow it on a lot of expensive clothes, a car, some new gadget? You, too, were accustomed to a certain level of prosperity. We settle into a financial comfort zone.

For some, having a few thousand dollars in the bank is enough of a cushion. If that number jumps significantly in any direction, they adjust their lifestyle to return to their comfort zone. Be it spending or saving, we try hard not to stray from what we have become accustomed to.

If you can step outside of your own perspective, you can see that someone who has $50,000 in the bank can be just as comfortable living as someone who has $50,000 in debt. Each of those people are comfortable with their status because they have learned to live that way. Each lives in a way to maintain that standard.

Someone who doesn't have money is most likely uncomfortable driving through a rich neighborhood, or going to a fancy restaurant since it is such a stretch for them to do so. Their brains send messages of "I don't deserve to be here, I don't feel welcome here, I don't fit in here." Someone who has money probably doesn't think twice because they are so used to experiencing such wealth.

Those who have money will pinch, save and cut back in order to maintain a wealthy status if they've taken some sort of blow monetarily. Building reserves back up to that comfortable level becomes a serious goal. So why aren't we all rich?

We limit ourselves with our beliefs. Our silent messages rule what we feel we "deserve." Instead of stretching our monetary boundaries to experience a richer side of life, we would prefer to keep things the way they are. So...we blow our savings and repeat the same old stories in our heads. We also surround ourselves with others who can reinforce this "normal" income in our lives.

Jack Canfield had a boss and mentor who asked him to set a goal higher than he thought he could achieve. He set a goal to make $100,000 the next year. It took him five years to take that goal seriously, but once he did, he made $92,000. He used action, motivation and positive affirmation to remind himself of his goal and to work toward achieving it. Every year since then, he's made over a million. How's that for pushing boundaries?

Where is your comfort zone? How willing are you to stretch? If you're like me, you've begun making excuses: "Jack Canfield already had a name for himself to be able to reach such a goal. I bet he didn't have debt to pay off first. I'm married. I have children. I have a steady job." Whatever your story, let it go for the time being. Play with this principle. See what happens.

Pick any number that seems like "too" much in your head. Write it down, put a future date next to it and get to work. Just see what happens, see what doors open up for you, follow the flow of inspiration that begins. Begin to get comfortable with that number and revisit it every day. More than once if you can.

Dream big and expect more of yourself. You've made it happen before and your inner power for success is even greater than you are aware of. Stretch what you know and ask for what you want, even if it seems rediculous. Live with intent.

Create your reality,
Coach Katie

Learning to Live in Patience

I've finally taken control over a friend's computer in order to jump on the internet. My computer is currently ill and subsequently has been put in time out because I'm rather angry with it. Nothing can garble my brain waves more than computers, cars or pets being out of of commission for a while. It's been a week since I successfully used my computer for any length of time.

As a coach, I should know there is a lesson in this and that it's not worth getting worked up over. My brain, however, is trying to convince me otherwise. In any case, I'm learning to live with patience until I can again be a free internet loving woman. I am trying to have fun with this newly found time. I've caught up on old phone calls, a little bit of reading and even done some tidying around the office. I think it has been good for me. I move in stealth mode to catch a snapshot of my e-mail while there is a free computer around. All in all, I'd like to say I don't miss the internet one bit, but I really do.

Life can be challenging. A friend of mine once said that he thought challenges were the Universe's way of making sure we were on the right path. If we can't stand up to the challenge (or rather choose not to), then perhaps we really didn't want to go down that road afterall.

Think of any relationship you have been in. Some have worked out, some have not. For those of you that are married, or have had a friend for years, you know that it takes work. Through the challenges, your partnership becomes stronger. You choose to endure those hard times because you know deep in your heart that your two feet are planted firmly where they are meant to be.

While being without a computer for a week is hardly a serious challenge, I found wisdom in the brief reminder that this was just a small pebble in the road. Bigger boulders will find me in the future. Sometimes, when I'm really living authentically, the road ahead of me is straight and easy to navigate. I try to notice the little moments, find my lesson, right my path and move on to that straight road. I encourage you to try it.

Viewing our challenges as gifts of direction, motivation and support can do a world of good for the nerves. My family always used to ask me if I would remember whatever I worked up over in 10 years. Usually my answer was no. Is it worth our energy, stress, anxiety and anger if we are without our cars for two days? If someone cuts us off in traffic? If we fail to turn in a report on time? If we have a fight with our spouse? Not usually.

In the long haul, those aren't the moments we remember. They simply serve as reminders for us. I can't begin to describe to you, though I think you understand, how much I appreciate my car when I get it back after it's been in the shop. I'll feel the same way when my part comes in for my computer and I am happily lauching programs and surfing the internet. These moments teach me patience and appreciation.

Have a great weekend and give this a try: appreciate things before they are taken away. We all have so many gifts to share, friends to support us and peripheral "stuff" to help us along the way. Gratitude is a very becoming quality.

In gratitude and patience,
Coach Katie

Struggling with Letting Go

In lieu of my last post about the stories we tell ourselves, I'd like to write a little bit about letting go. Maybe you have worked your way into awareness regarding what is holding you back, maybe you are still pushing forward with discovery. Either way, I can assure you that once you define a story to work through, you will want instant gratification. Awareness doesn't mean success, unfortunately. If you're anything like me, and I believe that most of you are, it's difficult to keep going after you've slipped backwards a few times.

Here is what I propose based on many books that I've read and many wise souls I have had the privilege of talking to: Learn to let go. Set your intention. Be sure it is confident, detailed and positive. Then let go. Unattach yourself from the outcome and see how your intention chooses to manifest itself in your life. Setting strong intentions takes a lot of work and learning to let go of the outcome takes a lot of self control!

Instead of stating that you want to lose weight, use language that is specific: On September 30th at 5 o'clock, I will weigh 130 lbs. By stating this so matter-of-factly, you keep yourself accountable. Instead of stating you want a better job, say something like: I deserve a job that uses my skills and talents. On January 1st, I will have done my research, discovered a better position for myself and will be actively seeking employment in that field.

I was once encouraged by a friend of mine to set my inentions on paper with magazine clippings and then write at the bottom,"This, or something better, is manifesting itself for me right now. I trust the Universe's plan for me."

I love that quote because it reminds me that I might not get exactly what I asked for. You know what? That is okay. Everything has a way of fitting together the way it is supposed to. We have wonderful things working their way into our lives right now. We just aren't aware of them yet. Sometimes what we ask for isn't what we need.

Friends, this is a hard concept to accept. I still struggle with letting go of the intentions I really, really want. We are all still creating our reality and that will never change. It's our responsibility to accept what we've created, continue working to make it better and share the knowledge we know. Often, I find that when I loosen my grip a little bit, everything seems to fall into place. Have you ever experienced this?

Practice this and know that I practice it with you,
Coach Katie

Positive Mantras

In my last post, I talked about creating a positive story, or mantra, to counter any negative stories you catch yourself in. Kirsten Harrell, Psy.D. and Traci Harrell have created a website dedicated to positive mantras and attitude shifters that can be downloaded onto an ipod or purchased on CD. Enjoy!

Check them out at:
www.ipopin.com

Clearing out the Critical Clutter

Why can't I seem to keep friends? Why can't I keep a boyfriend? Why am I unhappy in my job? Why is my house such a wreck? Why do I keep getting sick? Why do I seem to be a magnet for bad tidings?

If these questions often circulate through your head, it's time to clear out the clutter. I don't necessarily mean physical clutter either. I am also referring to the critical thinking clutter we allow to take over our thoughts. It makes concentrating on anything hard and it hurts our self esteem. In coaching terms, we call these our stories. We each have certain stories we tell ourselves. Unfortunately, most of the time we don't even know we are being critical of ourselves because those thoughts have become such a part of our subconscious selves.

I'll share a story that I once tortured myself with. One day a friend of mine asked me to go climbing. I was thrilled to be asked as I always seemed to sit back and wait for someone else to do the asking. (Sound familiar?) Shortly after accepting the invitation, I became aware of a thought that went through my head. Almost immediately I said to myself that she was only asking me because she needed a climbing partner. I then noticed a pattern as I ran through a slew of other moments that people "only asked me to join them because..." I did adventurous activities, I had extra gear, they needed someone to go with...etc, etc.

It was a comfortable thought, which scared me. I knew that it was so natural because I had become so accustomed to believing and repeating it. I don't know when the thought started or how long I had been telling myself this story. It was subconscious until I caught myself. What a horrible lie I had been telling myself. I was subtracting my own self worth through a thought I didn't even know I was capable of! Of course these friends wanted me around.

I began practicing a change in attitude to clear out the critical clutter. Instead of thinking people only asked me to do things because they needed to, I began reminding myself that they wouldn't ask if they didn't want me there. Not to mention they didn't have to invite me in the first place! I began asking them to do things, too. This not only made me a better friend (it is a two way road!), but it also reinforced the fact that they wanted me around because they said yes when they could have said no. I then began a personal mantra to flip that story in my head every time I caught myself thinking it.

Not only did I learn something about myself, but I saw how I was hurting my own relationships through it. The time had come to stop blaming others and to stop making excuses. I noticed a pattern and the problems that manifested from it in my personal life. I took control, worked with my coach and came up with a solution to take responsibility. What a wonderful outcome I created! My friends have grown exponentially since then.

I encourage you today to listen to those little thoughts that race through your head. The ones that say you can't do it, you aren't worth it or that no one will care. Take control of your stories, flip them around and make sure you squash them before they do any more damage. Clear out the critical clutter to move forward and live an undeniably happy life because it starts with your actions. You ARE worth it, you CAN do it and I promise, we DO care. You're only as successful, personable and wise as you allow yourself to be. Why hold yourself back?

Love and encouragement,
Coach Katie